Lou Reed in the Darkness and Light

“Some people like to go out dancing / And other people, (like us) they gotta work / And there’s always some evil mothers / They’ll tell you life is full of dirt / And the women never really faint, and the villains always blink their eyes / And the children are the only ones who blush / ‘Cause life is just to die.” Lou Reed

This week we lost a music icon, at least in my eyes.

Some of you don't know Lou Reed. Some of you have him deep in your soul like I do. He spoke from a darker side of life. But he spoke with a soulful gritty voice, of life and death and love. He spoke of the people we turn our faces from, people we should lend a hand to, not turn a back to. At least that's how I feel.

As we've recently seen with actor Cory Monteith, not all drug users are evil. I can honestly say that without exception, EVERY substance abuser I have known, didn't do it for the selfish pleasure of the feel of the high, they did it to feel more comfortable in their own skin. They take the drug, to erase who they are, because there's something about them that they just can't live with. So every day they try to forget who they are. Those are the people who just can't kick it. Whatever it is, from heroin to alcohol. So those of us who are strong, and can last more than a day with just ourselves. We are blessed, we are lucky and shouldn't look down at someone who hurts just to look at himself in the mirror.

“Oh, it’s such a perfect day / I’m glad I spend it with you / Oh, such a perfect day / You just keep me hanging on … Just a perfect day / You made me forget myself / I thought I was someone else, someone good.” Lou Reed

Some of us make it from the dark into the light. Some of us learn how to live with ourselves. Lou Reed did that, without forgetting where he came from. Without having to bury his past. There are so many of us who are ashamed of that past, because of those looks we can get.

Lou fought for his life. His lack of faith in himself cost him his liver. Someone believed in him and gave him a second chance, but it wasn't meant to be.

Fly Fly Away Lou Reed. Your music will be with us forever. That's your redemption and your legacy. Your music will always be in my soul.

Counting my Blessings

I spent last night counting things I'm thankful for instead of sheep (like the song Count my Blessings Instead of Sheep" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgZJGl101KE ). It actually helped me fall back to sleep at 4 when the puppy woke me to go outside. She's been sleeping well, but I think the growth spurt is forcing her to eat more and with more food, comes more emptying.

Everyone here survived Thanksgiving once again. Although the boys came screaming to me at 7 pm that they were starving and needed food, because they couldn't eat their other grandmothers Thanksgiving dinner. Overcooked jerky turkey that was too dry to chew, "gravy" that was just grease with no thickening agent, green beans that tasted like water, and sweet potatoes that were just cooked and barely smashed (not mashed). The only edible things were the garlic mashed potatoes and corn souffle that my DD made and the store bought pies. We filled up on that.

I had to feed the boys, because their parents went off to stand in line for black Friday deals to buy them gifts that are too nice at prices they could afford. Those boys are spoiled, but when you consider that they politely  thanked their other grandmother for the horribly prepared food, they might have deserved it.

Luna want shopping with them, because she still can't be separated from her mom at night. They took her stroller for her to sleep in, because the last deal was at 5 am. But DD couldn't make it and her FIL came to rescue her and Luna at 11 pm while Luna's dad stayed for the final deal.




Some of the things I am thankful for.

The health of my family, including my son who finally got his heart patched up and ticking in a way that will make it last longer before more surgery.

A roof over my head, small and tight, but warm, and food in my stomach.

The ability to think and work and earn an income, no matter how small it is.

All of the lovely friends and customers have because of my journey into the online retail business.

The fact that anonymous posts to this blog are blocked :)

Hope you all had a joyous Thanksgiving and can count your blessings instead of sheep too.

To The Friends I Haven't Met

I have so many friends through Twitter, Facebook and my selling sites, that I have never met face to face. And because of this, I don't know if you're chubby, or thin (unless you are so proud to loose weight that you show me) talk with a lisp, have a limp, are strait or gay (your spouse could be same sex), are missing limbs, have pink hair (like my DD) or gray hair, have tattoos, are dyslexic (or choose to ignore spellcheck) or anything else that some people might use to try to fit you in some "category".

You are my friend.

Every time I might think I've fit someone in the right category, they prove me wrong. Like the friend who is not only Catholic, but an active member of her church, who is constantly posting in favor of gay rights. I've given up putting people in neat boxes a long time ago.

So if you are really short, really tall, missing teeth, have your nose on the wrong side of your head, or are even planning to vote for Romney, I'll still love you as a friend, because anyone who can put up with me and the things I have to say, are worth keeping.

Just thought you'd like to know.

Thanksgiving 2011

This is mostly for those in the US, but why not take this time to be thankful for what you have. In our family we celebrate many international Holidays. I even had the opportunity to spend a Thanksgiving in China. You can read about it here if you're curious.

I'm posting this before Thanksgiving so you have a little love before your family who you DO love dearly drives you crazy with the noise and the arguing and the I wish I was somewhere else and the over stuffing and the mess to clean.

I wanted, first of all, to let you all know how much I appreciate every single one of you. Yes you. You who reads my blog, you who supports me, you who tweets with me and listens to my troubles and my joys. You are my friend, and I would be nothing but a sad mess without you.

I am also grateful for the friends and strangers who have helped my family through our struggles in the past few years. How kind and wonderful to share in even these tough times. Your kindness has not gone unnoticed or unappreciated.

So this year, close your ears to the arguing, you're loved ones are with you; be thankful for the mess, because it meant you had a huge table of food; and if you're like me, mentally block out the football games.

Wishing all my friends a Very Happy Thanksgiving.

What Evah! - Ticket to Cleveland

If you know me, and some of you do. You know that my son needs surgery. He doesn't look so bad, but inside he's a wreck. He needs a valve repaired/replaced and the Cleveland Clinic is ready to go. He just needs to get there (or rather here) from North Dakota.

It turns out that collecting miles is very complicated. It would take at least 50,000 miles round trip, they can only be collected in lots of 1000 and someone has to pay $15 for each lot of 1000 miles donated. That actually ends up costing more than the flight so unless someone has enough miles for the whole flight and can buy him a ticket outright, not really worth it.

Flights are not too expensive, but it is more than we have to spare right now. If any of my friends can donate any little amount, even $1 my son, Poppy and her boys would appreciate it more than you can know.

Our goal includes a bit extra for travel and food expenses in Cleveland, but if we can't get that, we can use whatever we can get.  Please click on the Donate right over there -----> for more no obligation information. There is a little bit of a blurb about his history.

A MOST UNUSUAL THANKSGIVING DINNER

In 2007 My family went out of town for Dinner so I chose to accept an out of the country commission, in China. Here's how I celebrated Thanksgiving that year.

Thanksgiving 2007

Today I enjoyed Thanksgiving lunch with my Chinese family, a Designer, an engineer, 2 factory managers, a product manager, and our driver. I was the only American, as all of my associates had gone back to the States to have Thanksgiving with their families. It was only lunch and not quite Thanksgiving Day in the US, but I imagined that this was my Thanksgiving dinner.

We ate things that might have been eaten in America that first Thanksgiving, rabbit, corn and beans. I was sure that the bamboo sticks the rabbit was threaded on, and the shiny aluminum foil protecting their ends, were not used that first Thanksgiving, but the meat was very tasty.

The corn, which I am sure the pilgrims must have eaten, was very good also, although ours was cooked in egg yolk and sprinkled with large crystalline grains of pale brown sugar. The green beans were cooked with almost neon purple skinned eggplant that had a fire-roasted flavor. This was the best of all of the dishes, but I’m positive that eggplant hadn’t arrived in the Americas for many years after the first Thanksgiving.

We had a pot of animal insides, stomach, liver, and I’m not sure what else, that were boiled in broth with some sort of meatballs, and quail eggs. I was not really sure what animal it was or what the meatballs were made of, and maybe I didn’t really want to know. We were served a heaping platter of pork meat with even more heaps of dried hot red peppers. The meat wasn’t very spicy , I guess the peppers were just decoration.

We had a plate of finely chopped broccoli. Not the best tasting thing on the table though, and I like broccoli. It was steamed with no seasoning. Too plain for my taste, but healthy so I ate a large portion. The best tasting dish was the rice noodle with spicy sauce. Large flat translucent noodles with garlic and spicy oil, and so much hot pepper that the oil is a deep glistening red.

There was a small iron dish of bubbling hot spicy beef. This one is a favorite of mine. Small tender strips of beef, that simmer in a little oil and broth with a lot of hot peppers, garlic, and fresh cilantro, and have a flavor similar to Mexican food.

The food was all served on a large rotating tray, like an over sized lazy Susan. That’s how my Chinese family eats in a large group. It is really a nice way to dine. You rotate food around and take only what you want, when you want it, no fighting. There is plenty for everyone, and no mother over stuffing your plates with amounts and food you don’t really want.

The conversation went on, just like any family dinner. There were heated discussions and lots of laughing. I didn’t understand a word of it. I did hear my name mentioned once and was told that they complimented me for something. I believed them.

We sipped hot tea and a canned herbal tea drink and enjoyed the company of friends and good food.

My mind wandered to my many years of Thanksgiving with my family in the U.S. This was my first Thanksgiving away from home. I have spent my birthday away, many times, and I have been without part of my family other holidays, but never so far away.